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Currently Viewing Category: Step by Step (Habit Creation)

The Lazy Guide to Success; Three Principles

Take Easy Baby Steps (Repeat ad Infinitum) Being basically a lazy person (I’m always looking for a faster, easier way) I figured out a long, long time ago that the scariest mountain can be conquered…

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You WILL Pay the Price…

Yes, we all get lucky now and then and something wonderful falls into our laps and that’s terrific. However, as a general rule, “wishing and…

One Secret of Happiness: Cultivating the “Active Constructive Response”

When we receive news or respond to a comment or compliment, we have a choice of 4 styles of response. Imagine a 4-square grid with…

Avoiding “Dumsor” Motivation/Energy Levels

Dumsor* (doom-sore) is a Ghanaian phrase used in reference to the frequent power outages and rolling blackouts that are epidemic to the country; it translates loosely…

How to Access Your Best Self?

We don’t always do as well as we know. The challenges of the day are often many; life gives us pop quizzes at the most…

Don’t Bury the Lead

“Don’t bury the lead” is an expression that comes from journalism. The “lead” is the first sentence of any communication and it should clearly and…

Stop Lying… to Yourself

We like to think of ourselves as rational thinkers, coming to objective conclusions about the world around us. Truth be told, study after study has…

Why I Can’t Be at Peace Now

The mind, the ego, the subconscious often have multiple reasons why peace must be just around the corner (or difficult/impossible because of some past event)…

Don’t Let Your Pain Control You

Time heals all wounds… if we do not go back and re-wound ourselves by making the pains of the past the story of our lives,…

Who Runs Your Life?

Are you really free if you are bound by habits/desires you fail to muster the willpower to shake? Habits are a fixed way of thinking,…

The Undisciplined Pursuit of More

Do you know you? Really, really know yourself? Understand your drives, motivations, triggers, deepest longings, most hidden fears? How self-aware are you truly? How much…

Three Secrets to Unhappiness

Nurture Resentments Why rent space in your head to those that don’t love you, to thoughts that don’t serve you? One of my favorite affirmations…

In Search of Courage to Face the Ordinary Day

In times of crisis we are often energized. Our skills are called upon and we respond to the clear and present danger. The need is…

Daily Decisions

We are smart. Boy, are we smart. We generally know what to do; what actions will move us forward. We are dumb. Boy, are we…

5 Ways to Love Yourself Better

1) Become Your Own BFF: Get on over on your own side and stay there! Hush up that inner critic! Objective observation, clear-eyed evaluation, solution-oriented…

The Full Glass

Proponents of optimism and positive thinking (of which I am unabashedly an advocate, see links below on the health benefits) tell us to see the…

Staying Calm when Angry

Anger can have a positive side; it energizes us when we are threatened or when boundaries have been violated. Unfortunately, most of the time anger…

Micro-Moments of Positivity: One Secret to a Long Life

All else being equal, the happier you are, the longer and healthier your life. Anger, stress, gloominess, melancholy, downheartedness, the blahs, the funk, the blues:…

Your Inner Life is Your Greatest Source of Strength

There is a voice inside your head that is constantly “on”, chattering away, talking to you. This voice has a personality, a world view, tendencies,…

Creating Emotions That Serve You

We generally view emotions as like the weather: something that happens beyond our control that we just have to live with. The truth is we…

What Triggers You?

You’ve lived with yourself for a good number of years but how well do you know yourself? Understand yourself? Do you REALLY know your motivations…

Juvat Impigros Deus

“Juvat Impigros Deus” is the motto on the coat of arms of the Ramsden family, who held the Manor of Huddersfield since the reign of…

Non-Perfectionism: Is it Right for You?

Perfectionism is like fire; helpful if contained and directed, dangerous if allowed to run amuck. Wikipedia defines perfectionism as a personality trait characterized by 1)…

The Cycle of Inquiry

“There is very little difference between people but that little difference makes a big difference.” – W. Clement Stone One little difference that makes a…

Don’t Believe Everything You Think

Our own minds can lead us astray; we humans are subject to numerous logical fallacies, the most common of which is “confirmation bias” in which…

“The Upward Spiral”

We all have gotten in a downward spiral; fears and worries and a bad event or two can knock us off course and it is…