Patrick Lenocioni is a business writer who specializes in using fables, or stories, to get his point across. His books are generally quick reads and entertaining, his points simple but compelling. His most famous book is the “The Five Dysfunctions of a Team.” His writings include “Death by Meeting,” “The Five Temptations of a CEO,” “The Four Obsessions of an Extraordinary Executive,” and “The Three Signs of a Miserable Job.”
“Silos are nothing more than the barriers that exist between departments within an organization, causing people who are supposed to be on the same team to work against one another. And whether we call this phenomenon departmental politics, divisional rivalry, or turf warfare, it is one of the most frustrating aspects of life in any sizable organization. Most silo issue[s] [are] probably more structural and organizational than interpersonal.”
Lenocioni seems to do a better job of defining the problem than solving it. Though, in truth, bringing the issue into the open is half the battle. While he dresses it up a bit (see below), he essentially calls for making the extent of the problem clear——having the courage to say the emperor has no clothes——that what we are doing is not working like it should, we are spinning our wheels, we are capable of so much more if we can all just get on the same page, trust each other, and communicate clearly, concisely, cleanly without posturing, ego, personal agenda, or drama.
He suggests role-playing as a method of building understanding and trust: different department heads taking each other’s positions and arguing their case as if it were their own. It is a good idea and is really just a business-specialized version of Stephen Covey’s “Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood.”
Lenocioni suggests creating a mythical crisis and using the power of the crisis to visualize change: If we continue down this road of butting heads and working at cross purposes, what if our competition cleans our clock, steals our biggest clients, while we are busy bickering internally? The thesis is that once the true cost is realized AND people unite under a common goal (see “A Thematic Goal” below) and defined objectives and metrics, intelligent people will behave better.
While all these are good and perhaps even necessary things, I found myself pulling out “Principle Centered Leadership” by Stephen Covey and turning to the chapter “Thirty Methods of Influence,” particularly those, 9 through 19, dealing with relationships (a paragraph on each method is at the end of this post):
9. Assume the best of others.
10. Seek first to understand.
11. Reward open, honest expressions or questions.
12. Give an understanding response.
13. If offended, take the initiative.
14. Admit your mistakes, apologize, and ask for forgiveness.
15. Let arguments fly out open windows.
16. Go one on one.
17. Renew your commitment to things you have in common.
18. Be influenced by them first.
19. Accept the person and the situation.
Changing human behavior is not easy but it is an extremely high-leverage activity. The key to changing human behavior is to impact the belief systems, paradigms, and world views that drive the behavior. “Thirty Methods of Influence” packs more wisdom in 10 pages then I have seen elsewhere. As always, I share what I most need to learn.
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Solution summary of “Silos, Politics, and Turf Wars: Destroying the Barriers that Turn Colleagues into Competitors”
The model for combating silos consists of four components:
1. A Thematic Goal: a single qualitative focus that is shared by the entire leadership team–and ultimately, by the entire organization–and that applies for only a specified time period.
It must be,
– Single. There can only be one. Something has to be most important.
– Qualitative. This is not a number. It is a general statement of a desired accomplishment requiring a verb because it rallies people to do something, such as improve, reduce, increase, grow, change, establish, eliminate, accelerate, etc.
– Time-Bound. The thematic goal does not live beyond a fixed time period, because that would suggest that it is an ongoing objective.
– Shared. The thematic goal applies to everyone on the leadership team regardless of their area of expertise or interest.
2. A set of Defining Objectives: Components or building blocks that serve to clarify exactly what is meant by the thematic goal. Like the thematic goal, these objectives are also qualitative, time-bound, and shared.
3. A set of ongoing Standard Operating Objectives: The ongoing objectives that don’t go away from period to period. The danger is in mistaking one of these critical objectives for a rallying cry, or thematic goal.
4. Metrics: Measurement. Metrics could be numbers or dates (time frames).
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Thirty Methods of Influence—Relationships:
9. Assume the best of others.
Assuming good faith produces good fruit. By acting on the assumption others want and mean to do their best, as they see it, you can exert a powerful influence and bring out the best in them. Our efforts to classify and categorize, judge, and measure often emerge from our own insecurities and frustrations in dealing with complex, changing realities. Each person has many dimensions and potentials, some in evidence, most dormant. And they tend to respond to how we treat them and what we believe about them. Some may let us down or take advantage of our trust, considering us naive or gullible. But most will come through, simply because we believe in them. Don’t bottleneck the many for fear of a few! Whenever we assume good faith, born of good motives and inner security, we appeal to the good in others.
10. Seek first to understand.
Seek first to understand, then to be understood. When we’re communicating with another, we need to give full attention, to be completely present. Then we need to empathize—to see from the other’s point of view, to “walk in his moccasins” for a while. This takes courage, and patience, and inner sources of security. But until people feel that you understand them, they will not be open to your influence.
11. Reward open, honest expressions or questions.
Too often we punish honest, open expressions or questions. We upbraid, judge, belittle, embarrass. Others learn to cover up, to protect themselves, to not ask. The greatest single barrier to rich, honest communication is the tendency to criticize and judge.
12. Give an understanding response.
Using the understanding response (reflecting back feeling), three good things happen: 1) you gain increased understanding and clarity of feelings and problems; 2) you gain new courage and growth in responsible independence; and 3) you build real confidence in the relationship. This response has its greatest value when a person wants to talk about a situation laden with emotions and feelings. But this response is more attitude than technique. It will fail if you try to manipulate; it will work if you deeply want to understand.
13. If offended, take the initiative.
If someone offends you unknowingly and continues to do so, take the initiative to clear it up. Consider two tragic consequences of not taking the initiative: first, the offended one often broods about the offense until the situation is blown out of proportion; second, the offended one then behaves defensively to avoid further hurt. When taking the initiative, do it in good spirits, not in a spirit of vindication and anger. Also, describe your feelings—when and how the offense took place—rather than judging or labeling the other person. This preserves the dignity and self-respect of the other person, who then can respond and learn without feeling threatened. Our feelings, opinions, and perceptions are not facts. To act on that awareness takes thought control and fosters humility.
14. Admit your mistakes, apologize, ask for forgiveness.
When we are party to seriously strained relations, we may need to admit that we are at least partly to blame. When one is deeply hurt, he draws back, closes up, and puts us behind prison bars in his own mind. Improving our behavior alone won’t release us from this prison. Often the only way out is to admit our mistakes, apologize, and ask forgiveness, making no excuses, explanations, or defenses.
15. Let arguments fly out open windows.
Give no answer to contentious arguments or irresponsible accusations. Let such things “fly out open windows” until they spend themselves. If you try to answer or reason back, you merely gratify and ignite pent-up hostility and anger. When you go quietly about your business, the other has to struggle with the natural consequences of irresponsible expression. Don’t be drawn into any poisonous, contentious orbit, or you’ll find yourself bitten and afflicted similarly. Then the other person’s weaknesses will become your own, and all this will sow a seed bed of future misunderstandings, accusations, and wrangling. The power to let arguments fly out open windows flows out of an inward peace that frees you from the compulsive need to answer and justify. The source of this peace is living responsibly, obediently to conscience.
16. Go one on one.
An executive might be very involved and dedicated to his or her work, to church and community projects, and to many people’s lives, yet not have a deep, meaningful relationship with his or her own spouse. It takes more nobility of character, more humility, more patience, to develop such a relationship with one’s spouse than it would take to give continued dedicated service to the many. We often justify neglecting the one to take care of the many because we receive many expressions of esteem and gratitude. Yet we know that we need to set aside time and give ourselves completely to one special person. With our children, we may need to schedule one- on-one visits—a time when we can give them our
full attention and listen to them without censoring, lecturing, or comparing.
17. Renew your commitment to things you have in common.
Continually renew your basic commitment to the things that unite you with your friends, family, and fellow workers. Their deepest loyalties and strongest feelings attach to these things rather than to the problems or issues around which differences often emerge. Differences are not ignored; they are subordinated. The issue or one’s point is never as important as the relationship.
18. Be influenced by them first.
We have influence with others to the degree they feel they have influence with us. As the saying goes, “I don’t care how much you know until I know how much you care.” When another feels you genuinely care about him and that you understand his unique problems and feelings, he also feels he has influenced you. He will then become amazingly open. We take the prescription because it is based on the diagnosis.
19. Accept the person and the situation.
The first step in changing or improving another is to accept him as he is. Nothing reinforces defensive behavior more than judgment, comparison, or rejection. A feeling of acceptance and worth frees a person from the need to defend and helps release the natural growth tendency to improve. Acceptance is not condoning a weakness or agreeing with an opinion. Rather, it is affirming the intrinsic worth of another by acknowledging that he does feel or think a particular way.