This blog is in many respects a mea culpa, an acknowledgement of a personal growth opportunity. In the past, I’ve frequently been challenged to accept help. I’m stubborn and don’t take direction well (where is the lien between self-awareness and programming one’s self?); these are traits that propelled me into self-employment and have served me well as an entrepreneur.
Yes, there can be a thin line between “offering help” and implied criticism/controlling behavior particularly when help has not been requested and/or relates more to a chosen style or method than true effectiveness. The implicit message can be “you lack the ability to help yourself” so let me do it for you and at the extreme can be a method of creating co-dependency or undermining independence.
Yet most of the time a willingness to ask for and accept help is an indication of a healthy personality, not a sign of weakness. There is a natural dynamic of give and take to life; to be all that we can be as individuals and as a society, we must willing to be open to others and allow them to be open to us. When we make a practice of refusing assistance, we cut ourselves off from others and shut down potential opportunities for meaningful interaction, learning and growth.
“Accepting help doesn’t have to mean giving up control.” – Sarah Dessen, b. 1970, novelist
“Accepting help is its own kind of strength.” – Kiera Cass, ‘The Selection’, b. 1981
“Sometimes accepting help is harder than offering it.” – Star Wars, The Clone Wars
“For some reason for me, and a lot of people, it’s so hard to accept help even when it’s from your closest friends.” – Jenna Morasca, b. 1981, actress, swimsuit model, reality TV contestant, million-dollar grand prize winner in 2003
As always, I share what I most want and need to learn. – Nathan S. Collier