1.    As soon as you wake up, start thinking of all the things that are wrong with your life. Continue through out the day. Repeat as necessary.

2.    Imagine what others are thinking about you, how they are judging you, finding you wanting, belittling you behind your back. Use your imagination, arouse your indignation, get mad, heck, get even. They deserve a good talking to, they have it coming. Give them a piece of your mind and don’t listen to their protestations. You know better.

3.    Ramp up your inner critic. You know your shortcomings, lay into yourself. A good verbal beating will motivate you to change. It has worked in the past, made you feel/perform better, right? Right?

4.    Keep focusing on all the things in the world that need to be fixed. Keep a list, refer to it often. Share your gripes with everyone you meet.

5.     Blame your parents, blame your teachers, blame your boss. Never, ever take personal responsibility for solving the problems in your life. Sooner or later, someone (the government maybe?) will come along fix everything for you! Just wait. And wait. And wait.

6.     Always look out for #1 first. The world is full of selfish people and you’ve got to show them that you can compete with the worst of them. The Golden Rule is for suckers.

These six steps are guaranteed to work…unfortunately!